WWE Superstars Play PlayStation2 Games
by chocoholicbookworm
Summary: Nobody has come up with a storyline for... TWO WEEKS! The superstars are stuck in a hotel, and Kurt Angle buys a PS2. Just read it, okay?
1. I'm bored

**A/N: Hello. This is my first fic for wrestling. I hope you all enjoy.**

**This is basically about the WWE Superstars discovering a fun thing to do while the show's producers have no storyline. That fun thing is playing with a PlayStation2 game called Smackdown! Vs. Raw. I was inspired by my brothers, who play the game 24/7.**

**Genre: Humor/Parody. I've got a weird sense of humor. Don't kill or flame me if you don't find it funny. It's the first chapter! It'll get funnier! I think…**

**Rating: T, simply because I've got a weird sense of humor.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. PlayStation and PlayStation2 is Sony Entertainment's. Got it?**

**Reviews are appreciated.**

**A new chapter comes when reviews do. **

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Chapter One – I'm Bored

Eddie Guerrero and Rey Mysterio were seated on the floor of the living room of the hotel suite all the WWE superstars, from both Raw and Smackdown, male and female, were sharing (don't ask me how they all fit in one suite. Let's just say they did). What they were doing in a suite? Well, no one could come up with a new storyline, so they decided to torture the wrestling fans at home with a couch potato's greatest fear.

Re-runs.

Yes, that's right. Re-runs.

Oh and those fans that watch live? They tortured them with their greatest fear.

No live shows.

That's right. No live shows.

Don't ask me how they continued to keep on selling. It's hard to believe, but the idiotic fans continued to watch day and night, night and day, in their houses, in front of their television sets. They continued to worship their altars shaped like wrestlers made of chewed up bubblegum…

Er, I guess that's a different story. Back to the one I was writing…

It had been a couple of weeks since anybody came up with a decent storyline. Anyway, Rey and Eddie were seated on the floor, bored out of their wits.

"I'm bored," said Rey.

"Me too," said Eddie.

5 Seconds Later…

"I'm bored."

"I know, Rey-rey, I know."

Another 5 Seconds Later

"Eddie, I'm bored."

"I KNOW REY! I know. I know you're bored. I'm bored too! But what can we do? The idiots who run the stupid show didn't come up with any storylines for the past," he looked at his watch, checking the date, "two weeks. Two weeks ese! Can you imagine that, Rey-rey, two weeks with NO STORYLINES!"

"I know Eddie. I don't why we haven't gone out of business yet…"

"Don't jinx it holmes! Don't jinx it!"

"Okay. I'll keep quiet now."

10 Seconds Later

"Eddie?"

"Yes, Rey?"

"I'm bored."

Eddie stood up and left.

"Don't leave me Eddie! Don't leave me like when you left me to get beaten up by Nitro and Mercury when we still had a storyline!"

Eddie looked at him strangely. "I'm not leaving you, Rey-rey. I'm going to the bathroom."

"Oh."

Eddie left for the bathroom. Just then, Torrie Wilson entered the room and sat next to Rey. Unlike normal days when they STILL HAD A STORYLINE, Torrie was dressed normally; she wore an oversized faded pink sweatshirt and a pair of jeans. On her feet were cute toe socks (a/n: sorry. I could'nt resist. I LOVE toe socks.).

"Hi Rey."

"Hey Torrie."

"I'm bored."

"So am I."

5 Seconds Later

"Rey-rey?"

"Yes, Torrie?"

"I'm bored."

"Yep. I'm bored too."

5 Seconds Later

"Torrie?"

"Let me guess, Rey. You're bored. I am too."

"Nah. I was just wondering what's taking Eddie so long."

As if on cue, Eddie came out of the bathroom and flopped down next to Torrie.

"Hi Torrie."

"Hey Eddie."

"I guess you're bored too."

"Yep."

"If only there was something we could do until someone comes up with a storyline…" said Rey.

"Wanna go swimming?" suggested Torrie.

"Nah. We tried that a couple of days ago. We were bombarded with fans. That's why we're all stuck here ese," said Eddie.

"I think even the Room Service people are trying to sneak up on us," said Rey.

"More like, sneak up on you, Torrie, and the other divas," Eddie said, half-teasing, half-weary.

Just then, John Cena, Chris Jericho and Trish Stratus entered the room. John sat on the floor, right next to Eddie, Rey and Torrie, while Y2J and Trish plopped down on a couch.

"Hey guys," said Chris, quite unenthusiastically.

"Lemme guess," said Eddie. "The three of you are all bored."

"Gee, Captain Obvious, you reckon?" said Trish; she was becoming very cantankerous due to boredom. Everyone was used to it, though.

Just then, Christy Hemme entered the room.

"Hey all!" said she, all cheerful, like.

"Must you be so cheerful?" groaned the ever-so-cranky Trish.

"I dunno. Anyway," said the 2004 Diva-of-the-Year, "I think Kurt has a solution to our boredom."

"Kurt Angle? Since when do you hang out with Kurt Angle?" asked John.

"I guess when you're bored you don't have much of a choice," said Torrie darkly. They all laughed.

"Anyway," continued Christy, "Kurt bought a PlayStation2 at the store just a while ago."

"A PS2? Why didn't he buy an X-Box instead?"

"Or a Gamecube?"

"I dunno. But he bought a game called Smackdown! Vs. Raw."

Murmurs of excitement were heard throughout the room. Just then, Kurt Angle entered the room, carrying a PlayStation2 and a box of games (don't ask me how he managed to carry all that. He just did).

"I GOT DIBS!" yelled both Eddie and Rey.

"Wait," said Kurt. "We have to set this thing up."

Silence.

"Does, uh, anyone know how?"

More silence.

1 Hour Later, in which Everyone Tries to Set the PS2 Up

"Damn!" said Chris, who was the one who got to set the PS2 up, or so they thought.

"What's wrong?" asked Christy.

"We… don't… have… an… adaptor…" said Chris, quite frustrated.

"An adaptor?" asked Torrie.

"Y'know," said Chris, "those plug thingies that make these kinds of plugs," he showed her the PS2 plug, "fit into these kinds of sockets," he pointed at the socket. He muttered something about dumb blondes under his breath, but stopped when hed realized that he also had blonde hair.

"Oh," was all Torrie said.

"So where do we get the thingamajig?" asked Rey, who was excited to play with the game.

"Isn't there supposed to be one in the box?" asked Kurt, who was getting annoyed; he wanted to play with the PlayStation2 so badly it made him want to pull his hair out… if he had any, that is.

5 Minutes Later, in which They All Try to Look for an Adaptor

"There's no adaptor!" yelled Eddie; as always, his temper was getting the best of him.

"Why don't we just go to the store and buy one?" asked Torrie.

Long silence, in which they all realize that that was a rational thing to do.

"Why didn't I think of that?" said Trish.

"I dunno. C'mon, let's go buy an adaptor!" said Chris, like some sort of a battle cry.

2 Hours Later, in which the WWE Superstars Attempt to Buy an Adaptor, But Get Bombarded by Groupies

"We finally got one," said John, panting. They were chased by groupies wherever they went. Luckily, there was a store somewhere in town that was run by seniors (and only seniors shopped there as well) and there happened to be adaptors on sale.

A Few Minutes, in which the Superstars Try to Catch Their Breath…

"So… who goes first?" asked Kurt.

"WE GOT DIBS!" said Eddie and Rey.


	2. Reading the Manual Is Against the Law

Chapter 2 – Reading the Manual is Against the Law

Previously…

"_So… who goes first?" asked Kurt._

"WE GOT DIBS!" said Eddie and Rey 

Anyway…

Eddie and Rey were perched on the couch in front of the TV, grinning like lunatics. They were clutching their PS2 controllers, and looked like two six-year-old boys. Everyone else looked at them oddly, as if fearing for their sanity.

"Turn it on, holmes!" said Eddie to no one in particular.

"Kurt, turn it on!" said Rey to someone in particular.

"Christy, turn it on before these two wet themselves," Kurt said wearily to Christy.

"Trish, if you don't mind," said Christy, pleading.

"I don't know how either, honey. Torrie?"

"Nope. John?"

"I don't know how, man." All heads turned to Chris.

"Chris?" asked the other seven.

Chris went to the PS2 and pressed the on switch.

"How did you know that?" asked Kurt.

"I read the manual," said Chris, as nonchalantly as possible.

Everyone gasped.

"Y-you read the m-manual?" exclaimed a shocked Rey.

"B-but no one reads those things!" gasped Torrie.

Everyone kept quiet after, but kept on giving Chris weird looks.

"So what do we play first?" Eddie asked Rey.

"I dunno… tag-team match?" suggested Rey with a manic glint in his eyes.

"YEAH!" They gave each other high-fives, and did some sort of a victory dance which earned themselves weird looks from everyone else in the room.

"I knew they were going insane," said Chris to Trish under his breath.

"I heard that, evil manual-reader!" said Eddie, pointing dramatically at Y2J, who just sighed, rolled his eyes, but said nothing else.

"Right," said Rey, who got his controller and glanced at the TV excitedly. "Who do we play against?" he asked his partner… er, ex-partner, if we follow the storyline.

"I dunno… let's check the players, then…" said Eddie.

Apparently, the game was ©2004, so many players were not included in the rosters of Raw and SmackDown!.

"I'm not there yet!" wailed Christy.

"Yeah. MNM aren't there either," Trish pointed out.

"So who do we play against, then?" asked Rey.

Suddenly, a light bulb appeared over Eddie's head, which meant that he had a fantabulous idea – and that's saying something, seeing as fantabulous isn't even a word.

"Rey-rey," he whispered to Rey, "let's put Kurt and JBL in the other team. You know that even without the storyline, they fight a lot… I feel like annoying Kurt today. You know what I mean, ese?"

After Eddie said this, both he and Rey got manic looks on their faces, which earned more weird looks (actually, I don't think Kurt was giving them a weird look; he just had too much prune juice to drink for breakfast).

Eddie and Rey entered their opponents, and when Kurt saw…

"Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!"

1 Minute Later…

"Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!"

"SHUT UP KURT!" yelled Chris.

"DON'T SHUT ME UP, MANUAL-READER!" bellowed Kurt.

"WHAT'S SO WRONG ABOUT READING THE MANUAL?" Chris bellowed back.

"Does he really expect us to answer that?" Trish asked Christy under her breath.

"I do!" said Chris, having heard what Trish whispered to Christy in a not-so-subtle way.

"I now pronounce you man and wife. You may now kiss my ass!" said John.

"Eeeew! No one wants to kiss that, John!" Christy said, giggling.

"Except perhaps Torrie," Trish said, a little more subtle this time.

"Hey, what's all the commotion?" asked Randy Orton, who had just entered with Stacy Keibler.

"Well, you see, we were all bored out of our wits," began Torrie.

30 Minutes Later, in Which Torrie Gives an Account of the Events in Immense Detail…

"And while we were at the shop, trying to buy the adaptor thingamajig, there was this senior who looked like a prune. And then Eddie goes, 'holmes, you look like a prune!' and then…"

By this time, everyone was asleep – except for Eddie and Rey, who played what was their… er… how many games had it been? Oh, right. One. Wait a minute! Only one game!

"Eddie, I still haven't figured out how to start the match," said Rey.

"I haven't either, holmes. Real wrestling's easier than this, don't you agree, ese?"

"Yeah… Oh, wait! Look at that thingy on the screen. It's some sort of an X button, or something."

"You're right, Rey-rey! I wonder what it means…"

30 Minutes Later, in Which Torrie Continues Her Version of the Day's Events, While Rey and Eddie Have a Long Discussion Regarding the X Button…

"So anyway," said Torrie to a very much asleep Randy and Stacy, "Chris put the adaptor on the plug. And then, he put it in the socket over there. But then…"

As for Eddie and Rey…

"Maybe the X means we have to make these controller things look like the letter X?" asked Rey.

"Rey, I think we both know that's a little hard to do."

"Well, what do you think it means, then?"

"I don't know! Damn! Gone were the days when all we had to do was go to the GM and ask for a tag team match, or something!"

"Actually, we just followed what the scripts said. Now, however, there aren't any scripts to begin with!"

"I know, holmes, I know."

"Anyway, back to this X button…"

"Wait, Rey! There's a word beside the X!"

"Yeah! It says…" Rey squinted his eyes to read the word, "continue."

"Hmmm… what do you think it means?"

30 Minutes Later, in Which Everyone Finally Wakes Up, and Rey and Eddie Have Another Long Discussion…

"You guys haven't played yet, have you?" asked Kurt wearily. The two didn't answer him; they were so engrossed in their meaningless conversation about the letter X and it's connection with the word continue. Kurt made a noise of impatience; all the others were so sure that had he had hair at that time, he would have ripped all of it off.

Meanwhile, Rey looked at his controller. He noticed that there was a little X button that resembled the one on the screen.

"Hey Eddie!"

"What?"

"I think I know how to start the game already!"

"How did you find that out? No! Don't tell me! You read the manual as well, didn't you? NO! Jericho has corrupted you! No, Rey-rey, no! Where's the Rey-rey I knew and loved like a brother?"

"No, Eddie! I didn't read the manual! Look at the controller, there's a little X button that looks like the X on the screen! Maybe, just maybe, if we press it, we can continue and play the match!"

"It's crazy, but it might just be crazy enough to work!"

They pressed the X button, and…

3 Hours Later, in Which Everyone Else Got So Bored from Watching the Two Play That They Decided to Play Truth or Dare…

"Torrie, truth or dare?" asked Trish.

"Truth."

"Oooh! I've got a good one!" squealed Christy.

"What is it?" asked Trish. Christy whispered something in her ear.

"We already know they are, Christy! We don't have to ask her that!"

"Oh come on, Trish! Who knows, it might not be true!"

"Oh alright. Torrie," said Trish unenthusiastically, "what's going on between you and Cena?"

"We're together," Torrie said nonchalantly, before turning to Y2J.

"Chris, truth or dare?"

"Dare."

Everyone else huddled around Torrie and came up with the perfect dare for the so-called "manual-reader.

"Ok. Chris, I dare you to pull the plug on the PS2," Torrie said with a superior smirk on her face. Jericho paled; he knew that the two were going to kill him. However, he wasn't one to chicken out. So he went to the outlet, got the plug, and slowly removed it from the outlet…

"WHAT HAPPENED!" yelled Eddie; he looked furious.

"WHY'D IT TURN OFF!" hollered Rey.

Both pairs of eyes turned to Chris, who was lurking behind the TV cabinet, thinking he was unseen.

"I'M GONNA GET YOU!"

"SAVE ME JESUS!" cried Y2J as he was chased by the PS2-addicted pair.

"Now this," said Stacy, "is more entertaining than any PS2."

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**A/N: Hey, thanks for the reviews.**

**So our favorite tag team finally got to play. Haha. **

**As always, a new chapter comes when more reviews do!**


	3. Can't Touch This

**A/N: Hey all!**

**Here's the third chapter. Hope you all like!**

**I don't think it's as funny as my other two chapters… I'm running out of ideas, so if you guys have any, kindly suggest some when you review.**

**Oh, and, who do you want to see next?**

**a.HBK**

**b.Chavo**

**c.JBL**

**Please vote. Thanks.**

**Mucho thanks to all my reviewers. Do you know how much I love you guys? I probably love you guys almost as much as I love Rey Mysterio… he's obviously my favorite wrestler… hehe.**

**Please read and review. I will be eternally grateful if you do.**

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Chapter 3 – Can't Touch This

So Eddie and Rey chased the wrestler formerly known as Chris Jericho (he was now known as dead meat, a.k.a. toast, a.k.a. dead meat on toast, a.k.a. evil manual-reader).

The others had no idea what to do. They were torn between watching them run around the room while laughing their asses off, and going to a karaoke bar. None of these options would benefit the wrestler formerly known as Chris Jericho. They then decided to stay. Laughing at Chris (the evil manual-reader) was much more fun than any karaoke bar. DUH!

Kurt, however, was getting bored of laughing at Chris. He wanted to play with _his_ PS2. It was _his._ He payed for it. It belonged to him. The PS2 belonged to him, Kurt Angle. The one, the only, Kurt Angle. Only he, Kurt Angle, owned that particular PS2. For he was Kurt Angle. And the PS2 belonged to only him, Kurt Angle.

While the Mojo Jojo dialogue was going on in Kurt's mind, Eddie and Rey were cornering Chris, who was in a corner (how redundant did that just sound!)

Just then, Kurt made his mind up and touched _his_ PS2. He then inadvertently saved Chris Jericho, a.k.a yeah, you know the drill.

When Eddie and Rey spidey-sensed that Kurt was touching the sacred PS2 (don't ask me how the could spidey-sense), the turned away from their prey and yelled at Kurt.

"DON'T TOUCH THAT!"

Just then, Cena felt that it was the perfect time to spontaneously burst into song.

"Na na na na na na na na U can't touch this. Na na na na na na na na U can't touch this. Na na na na na na na na U can't touch this."

He began singing to Kurt, pointing at the PS2.

"But it's my PS2," wailed Kurt.

While this was going on, the evil manual-reader realized that he was free. Eddie and Rey's attention was now on Kurt Angle, the evil owner of the PS2 who actually started this. When he realized that he could move without anyone catching him, he laughed, sounding like a deranged maniac, tore his clothes off and ran outside, shouting "FREEDOM!"

Trish looked out the door. "He's got a nice ass."

Christy looked as well. "Yeah, he does, doesn't he?"

"Close your eyes child."

"Yes, mommy."

Meanwhile, back to Cena and everyone else.

John got sick of U Can't Touch This, so he decided to sing a different song.

"I am your angel of music! Come to me angel of music," he began to sing to Torrie, but Kurt, being who he is, felt left-out and decided to sing.

"ALL BY MYSELF! I DON'T WANNA BE ALL BY MYSELF ANYMORE…" he sang, very much off-key. Everyone looked at him oddly, fearing for his sanity, which seemed to go ever since the storyline draught began.

Eddie and Rey began to go towards the PS2 plug, and plugged it back in. Putting the TV on mute so that no one would notice, they began to play their next 50 games.

While Eddie and Rey played the next 50 games, John, Torrie, Randy, Stacy, Christy, Kurt and Trish began to have some sort of a songfest thing-y…

45 Minutes Later, in Which Eddie and Rey Play Their 5th out of 50 Games, and Everyone Else Sings…

"Damn you, Shelton," said Eddie; he and Rey were having a match against Charlie Haas and Shelton Benjamin to prove that _they_ were the World's Greatest Tag Team – not Shelton and Charlie. So far, they lost four games, and seemed to be losing their fifth game.

Meanwhile…

"Spectacular, spectacular, no words in the vernacular, can describe this great event, you'll be dumb with wonderment! Returns are at ten percent, you must agree that's excellent! And on top of all the fee, you'll be involved artistically!"

"Wait," said Randy, "I don't think those are the right lyrics, man."

"Yeah, you're probably right… I wonder what they are…"

30 Minutes Later, in Which Eddie and Rey Lose Their 9th Match Against Benjamin and Haas, and the Rest Figure Out What the Right Lyrics Are…

"Eddie, this is our 9th loss. Don't you think we should stop already?"

"No, Rey, we must prove that we're the WORLD'S GREATEST TAG TEAM!"

"Alright, then."

Meanwhile…

"Why don't we just sing some other song!" said John frustratedly.

"You know what? I think that's the best idea you've ever had, Cena!"

An Indefinite Amount of Time Later…

"Yes! WE FINALLY WON!" hollered Rey. He and Eddie hugged, as if this was a real match.

"WE WON, HOLMES! WE WON!"

"Yeah, Eddie, we won!"

Meanwhile…

"It's bananas! B-A-NAN-A-S! It's bananas! B-A-NAN-A-S!"

Now, since you readers are probably wondering where Chris is, I, the author responsible for all these wrestlers' idiotic, manic or downright stupid actions, have decided to bring him back into the story.

Chris suddenly ran back into the room, shutting the door, making sure that none of the paparazzi could get inside. All of them spent the entire time chasing him, taking pictures of his nude self. (Yes, I know, that sounded really wrong.)

"Uh, evil manual-reader?" said Christy.

"Yes?" Y2J responded wearily.

"You might wanna wear these," Christy said, tossing him a pair of boxers with cute little pink hearts on them. They landed smack on his face.

"Thank you," came the muffled reply.

"You're welcome," Christy said, pretending to be shy, batting her lashes.

"Stop flirting with him! He's mine," said Trish, going near him, purring.

"Even if I'm an evil manual-reader?"

"We can take care of that irrelevant detail."

"Don't worry, Christy, you still have me," said Kurt, giving Christy a toothy grin.

"Uh… Never mind, Kurt, it doesn't matter, really," Christy said, trying to be as tactful as possible.

"But I'll be good to you, Christy."

"I told you, Kurt, it doesn't matter."

"I'll send you stuff everyday! I'm an olympic gold medalist! I've got a lot of cash!"

"Kurt, don't bother, okay? Just don't."

"But Christy!"

"What, Kurt!"

"You're so pretty…"

"Ooooh! Kurt's got a little Crushy Wushy on Christy Wisty," said Randy in a singsong voice. Everyone looked at him weirdly.

"Are you sure I'm not dating a queer?" asked Stacy.

"Yep. Pretty sure," said Randy.

"Okay," replied Stacy.

"WHO WANTS TO PLAY NEXT?" hollered Rey; he and Eddie just finished their victory dance, and decided that since they already won, perhaps they could give it a rest.

"I DO!" said both Torrie and Stacy. They looked at each other.

"Bra and Panties Match?" suggested Torrie.

"Hell Yeah!" said Stacy.

They sat in front of the TV, getting ready to play.


End file.
